The past 3 weeks have been hectic to say the least. I have been living out of a suitcase for almost a month and now I finally finished setting up my new apartment and have time to sit down and post something. It’s quite incredible how in just that short time frame I have had so many ups and downs, some even in the same day. Today I will be highlighting those I found most significant to my overall recovery process. Here is the short breakdown of where I have been these past few weeks. End of August I flew back to Los Angeles to spend about 9 days with my boyfriend. On the 6th of September I flew to Seattle to stay with my future roommate in a Fraternity. I was there for about 10 days before I finally could move into my own place. But moving in was no cakewalk. We had to buy and build every piece of furniture in our apartment. But this is all leading up to one big point!
I was busier than a bee in May.
I had no time to even think about anything other than the things I was doing or the people I was with. Me being so busy acted as a sort of distraction from eating! Which is new to me. Forcing a distraction is one thing (does not work) but genuinely being preoccupied is another. Before food would consume my every thought but with activities to do and a real agenda to get to I had no time to worry or overthink my eating habits! Now this does not mean that I have found an all mighty cure because there is no way I can be this busy for the rest of my life. That is just unheard of. But what this does is let me know that my physical being is capable of handling and receiving normal feeding without feeling hungry all the time. What this proves exactly is that my “binge-hunger” is very much psychological and not physical. But that was not always the case.
When I used to restrict calories for weeks at a time my body was in dire need of nourishment. So back then I was binging out of physical need. My body was starving and was calling out for food! But now that I am slowly incorporating myself into a normal diet the urges I feel are merely habits that I established from when I used to starve. And like any bad habit, you simply have to learn how to break it.
I was busier than a bee in May.
I had no time to even think about anything other than the things I was doing or the people I was with. Me being so busy acted as a sort of distraction from eating! Which is new to me. Forcing a distraction is one thing (does not work) but genuinely being preoccupied is another. Before food would consume my every thought but with activities to do and a real agenda to get to I had no time to worry or overthink my eating habits! Now this does not mean that I have found an all mighty cure because there is no way I can be this busy for the rest of my life. That is just unheard of. But what this does is let me know that my physical being is capable of handling and receiving normal feeding without feeling hungry all the time. What this proves exactly is that my “binge-hunger” is very much psychological and not physical. But that was not always the case.
When I used to restrict calories for weeks at a time my body was in dire need of nourishment. So back then I was binging out of physical need. My body was starving and was calling out for food! But now that I am slowly incorporating myself into a normal diet the urges I feel are merely habits that I established from when I used to starve. And like any bad habit, you simply have to learn how to break it.